


still looking at the road we never drove on (and wondering if the one i chose was the right one)

by fuckinglarry



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M, Maybe - Freeform, idk - Freeform, kinda sad, larry - Freeform, some niam, stylinson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-20
Updated: 2013-08-20
Packaged: 2017-12-24 02:03:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/933862
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fuckinglarry/pseuds/fuckinglarry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Why the fuck is he here?" Louis heard the voice through his sleep induced mind, and before he could even begin to recongnise it, he was being thrust upwards by the front of his sweatshirt. "Liam, Niall get your asses down here. You've got quite a lot of explaining to do." The man in front of Louis was not so foreign as he'd expected. The famous white shirt he's always adored was clad on his chest, clinging perfectly in the right places, although, instead of his painted-on skinny jeans, he resorted to sweats. </p><p>The man in front of Louis- and currently leaving wrinkle marks on his Swedish sweatshirt- was non other than Harry Styles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	still looking at the road we never drove on (and wondering if the one i chose was the right one)

**Author's Note:**

> im sorry this was rushed and shit im sorry

Louis grasped the microphone just a bit tighter and stared into the crowd, all clad in black and white. The coffee shop was dead quiet, a pin could drop and everyone would be able to acknowledge it. He cleared his throat and nodded up at the sound advisor. The music started and Louis felt his eyes grow wet, his jaw clenching in anticipation.

"Man it's been a long day, stuck thinking bout it on the free way. Wondering if I really tried everything I could, not knowing if I should've tried a little harder." 

~

"Louis, mate. You've gotta get up and out of this room. I'm starting to smell you from the den. So to the bathroom you go, shoo, shoo." Louis curled his lip up at his bestfriend, but did as he said anyway. 

"You know Zayn, if you changed your approach, I wouldn't snarl at you when you decide to wake me up from a nice dream." Louis added to the effect of his words by slamming the bathroom door. 

"Fucking prick," Zayn mumbled under his breath and stalked out the door, leaving Louis to his own devices in the shower. 

Louis's bottom lip wobbled, and fresh tears streamed down his face as he turned the water on and stepped in.

~

"Oh, but I'm scared to death, that there may not be another one like this. And I confess, I'm only holding on by a thin, thin, thread."

~

"One for being a prick, one for being usless, one for being pathetic." Louis sliced his wrist, one cut at a time. Loving the sight of red mixing with the water. 

"One for making Harry leave." and with that final slash, he shut the water off and sliped out and into a towl, making sure to bandage his wounds thoroughly before getting dressed and walking down the stairs and into the kitchen. 

Zayn immediatly put the spatchula down and began crowding Louis' space. "Goddammnit Louis." 

He grabbed Louis's bandaged wrist and inspected it. He pursed his lips before saying, "you're moving in with Liam." 

All Louis could do was nod, and walk back upstairs.

~

"I'm kicking the curb cause you never heard the words that you needed so bad. And I'm kicking the dirt cause I never gave you the things that you needed to have. I'm so sad, sad."

~

Another night lost to nightmares. All of Harry. 

~

Louis grabbed his suitcases and began his desent down the stairs. Liam gave him a smile and took the bags out of his hands, bringing them out to the car. Louis turned to Zayn. 

"Please. Don't make me go back there." Louis' voice cracked, making Zayn flinch but he stood his ground. 

"You need to get over it Louis. It happened  _five years ago._  Don't you think it's time you moved on?"

"None of you understand that I actually loved him. I was  _in_ love with him." and with that, Louis picked up his toilettries and walked out, not sparing his bestfriend another glance. 

~

"Man, it's been a long night, just sitting here, trying not to look back. Still looking at the road we never drove on, and wondering if the one I chose was the right one."

~

"Welcome home, Lou!" Niall exclaimed the moment Louis stepped through the door. He grinned wildly and ran a hand through his fake blond hair. "I've missed you, bud." 

"I missed you too, Ni." Liam came up behind Louis and put his hands atop his shoulders. 

"Let's get your bags upstairs, yeah? Babe, mind helping us?" Niall nodded enthusiastically and bounded up the staircase. "Seriously though, welcome back, Louis," Liam whispered before bustling ahead of him and leading the way to the room that was now Louis'. 

~

"Oh, but I'm scared to death that there may not be another one like this. And I confess that I'm only holding on by a thin thin thread."

~

"Why the _fuck_ is he here?" Louis heard the voice through his sleep induced mind, and before he could even begin to recongnise it, he was being thrust upwards by the front of his sweatshirt. "Liam, Niall get your asses down here. You've got quite a lot of explaining to do." The man in front of Louis was not so foreign as he'd expected. The famous white shirt he's always adored was clad on his chest, clinging perfectly in the right places, although, instead of his painted-on skinny jeans, he resorted to sweats. 

The man in front of Louis- and currently leaving wrinkle marks on his  _Swedish_  sweatshirt- was non other than Harry Styles.

~

"I'm kicking the curb cause you never heard the words that you needed so bad. And I'm kicking the dirt cause I never gave you the things that you needed to have. I'm so sad, sad. I'm so sad, so sad."

~

Louis spooned his oatmeal up, but it never actually made it to his mouth. Not when a very angry Harry Styles was resorting to glaring a hole into his head. _"Will you just knock it the fuck off?"_

Louis put his spoon down. "Excuse me?" 

But Harry was already gone, making his way up the stairs and into his room, slamming and locking it. 

Niall looked over at Liam and Liam looked over at Louis. "He'll warm up to you, I promise."

"'m praying."

"That's the spirit!" Niall chirped, not registering the sarcasm that was driping from the words.

Liam just patted his back and excused himself to got talk to Harry. 

"You up for some shopping?" Niall asked, looking over at him from across the table.

"Yeah, why not." and with that, he pushed up from the table and walked to his room to get dressed.

~

"Oh, but I'm scared to death that there may not be another one like this. And I confess that I'm only holding on by a thin thin thread."

~

"So... I have this gig next Saturday night, you're, uh welcome to come if you like."

" _Why are you so fucking hot?"_ Louis looked up from the couch cushion and over at Harry. He pushed his glasses up further on his nose and gulped. 

"Uh," he looked around. "you're not talking to me are you?"

Harry chuckled darkly. "Nope, simply talking to the wall." 

"Well, uh, good." Harry just shook his head and came closer, grabbing Louis's hand and yanking him forward into a bruising kiss.

"You're such a dick, you know that?"Harry shouted once he pulled away. Louis sniffed but said nothing. "I was _pining_ after you for _two and a half fucking years_ , and you refused to acknowledge me until you decided that you wanted to be my _fuck buddy_." He lurched foward again, capturing his lips in a less agressive kiss. Harry licked his way into Louis mouth, sucking on his teeth and biting his bottom lip till it bled.

"Harry, stop." Louis pushed him away as his hands had began to creep up to Louis's neck, squeezing slightly. 

"Don't tell me to _stop_. You know, when you said you had _sexual_ feelings for me, my heart broke, but I can't tell you _no!_ " Harry's eyes filled with tears. "So for _three and a half years_ , I let you fuck me until you found that Eleanor girl, then you dropped me. Like I was a hot pan. And the worst part is, you didn't give a fuck about how heart broken I was. You didn't care that I was falling apart in front of your very eyes. 

"No, you turned away and pretended to not notice me slowly dying inside." Harry's grip tightend. "And you know the worst part?"

Louis shook his head and began to wonder why the hell Niall and Liam were taking so long at the store.

"I still love you! I can't even stop loving you to hate you!"

"I love you too! Why can't you realize that! I've loved you since X Factor! I made a mistake, I kow! I'm sorry!"There's a long pause and finally Louis whispers, "just come to the show on saturday." Louis sqeezedhis eyes shut and the pressure was relieved from his throat. He counted to ten and opened his eyes when the dizziness faded. 

When he looked around he noticed Harry had left.

He'd never felt so alone.

~

I'm kicking the curb cause you never heard the words that you needed so bad. And I'm kicking the dirt cause I never gave you the things that you needed to have.And I'm kicking the curb cause you never heard the words that you needed so bad. I'm so sad, so sad." 

As the music slowly fades out, Louis looks out into the crowd. 

His breath is stolen as he notices the one face he's been searching for these past five years. 

So when he walks off the stage and toward him, telling himself that, no, he wont fuck it all up this time, he actually believes himself.


End file.
